Of doubting source of money

I am a Muslim myself and well, as Muslims, we should try to use money from halal . But we can't always be sure of where the money is coming from, not unless you earn the money yourself through the proper means. Money given by relatives or even friends or even children aren't always guaranteed halal or not from dubious source. How do you know your son might not be giving you money from working in a bar or restaurant serving alcohol drinks? How do you know that your daughter did not sleep with someone for money or got it from other dubious means.. Or your friends brought a hamper or something for you which the money came from winnings in gambling or such.

I think we should be just grateful if someone gives us the money to help us out with a sincere heart instead of pondering where the money might have been coming from and making a fuss out of it. If we are to be so concern over it , we shouldn't at all accept any monetary gifts or any gifts at all and strive for it ourselves.

Forgive me if I am wrong or if I am being insulting but that is my two cents worth of thoughts.....

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Senior citizens return money

KEPALA BATAS: Tears flowed as 40 senior citizens here decided to return the RM100 compassionate money they received from the state government despite Chief Minister Lim Guan Eng's claim that the money was not from gambling sources.

The group, aged 60 and above, said they felt that the state government had taken them for a ride by giving them money from dubious sources.

Imam Saidin Chik, 65, of Kampung Pulau Mertajam, said he was disappointed after being told that the money could have come from gambling sources.

"I felt cheated. It is not right for me to keep the money now since I have doubts over its sources.

"I am very relieved that I have returned it," he said.

Saidin said he would advise other elderly folk from his village to return the money, too, and also to be extra careful when receiving donations from the state government in future.

Rosnani Rashid, 54, also from Kampung Pulau Mertajam suffered a nervous breakdown upon learning the matter as her fisherman husband Othman Mahmud, 62, had died in a road accident a week after receiving the money in April.

Their son, Mohd Fitri, 29, who was also involved in the incident succumbed to his head injury a month later.

"If we knew that the money was from dubious sources, my husband would have turned it down.

"I am very disappointed upon learning the news and decided to return it," she said.

Saad Jaafar, 77, from Kuala Muda said he returned the money on his own accord as he doubted the sources of the fund.

"As a Muslim, I have never been involved in gambling activities. So, I find it hard to keep the money," Saad said after a simple ceremony to return the money at Penaga assemblyman Datuk Azhar Ibrahim's service centre here.

Azhar said the ceremony was held after receiving many phone calls and inquiries from the senior citizens.

"They returned the money voluntarily as they felt that they were cheated by the state government."

Read more: Senior citizens return money http://www.nst.com.my/nst/articles/30senior/Article#ixzz10yRtbffQ

Counting my blessings...

I believe, counting my own blessings makes me stronger instead of mourning over what I do not have. No one can have everything and the person who does not know how to count his or her own blessings is damned for eternal miseries unless he or she learn to count their own blessings. 
Sometimes, as an imperfect human being, I do forget to count my blessing, and when I do that I find myself depressed and sad, envious, too.
I know when it comes to worldly goods or money, I do not have much. Heck, I started off with nothing and I'll got to my grave with nothing anyway, so it does not make too much sense in being too envious or jealous over other people's better fortune in that sense. Then I also bear in mind that not everyone who is rich is happy, nor is everyone who is poor is sad. There are still tears in rich abodes and laughter in small hovels. It is all just how you see it, and how one appreciate or know how to count his or her blessings.
OK.. the little things I am grateful of:-
My husband,Dzul, who accepts me as I am warts and all, and who loves me as I am and let me be the person I am today. Thanks.
My children, Talia, Adam and Anne who love me unconditionally.
My step children, Daniel and Alyssa who makes my life richer , just by their presence and who care for my children too.
My step children's mother, Amy and their grandparents, who have also become an important part of my life, who took me in and accepted me with arms wide open. Thanks so much to all of you. 
My mother,Elaine, for giving me life and bringing me up, she might have been kinda lousy at being a mother, but still, I learn a lot from her mistakes as well and in her way, she loves me and I do love her too.
Good health for my children and loved ones.
The little pleasures I derive from travelling whenever I can, from photography, from my books and novels, the letters I receive from my penpals, my hard earned laptop and facebook...
My cousin, Lilian and her family whom I've just found a month ago after such a long, long time. It feels good having 'family' around .
My facebook friends, my schoolmates who are back in my life and an assortment of friends who make my life more colourful and meaningful. Sharmila, Mahani, Aisyah, to name a few...
My nieces and nephews, in laws.....in good times...   c,")
Thanks everyone... and I love you all in different ways....
And well, that's what crosses my mind at the moment... 
Below are some articles I came across from the internet... (Not my own)
Count your blessings instead of your crosses;

Count your gains instead of your losses.
Count your joys instead of your woes;
Count your friends instead of your foes.
Count your smiles instead of your tears;
Count your courage instead of your fears.
Count your full years instead of your lean;
Count your kind deeds instead of your mean.
Count your health instead of your wealth;
Love your neighbor as much as yourself.
Author Unknown

~Counting My Blessings -Bing Crosby~

When I'm worried and I can't sleep

 I count my blessings instead of sheep  

And I fall asleep counting my blessings  

When my bankroll is getting small  

I think of when I had none at all  

And I fall asleep counting my blessings   

I think about a nursery and I picture curly heads  

And one by one I count them as they slumber in their beds  

If you're worried and you can't sleep  

Just count your blessings instead of sheep  

And you'll fall asleep counting your blessings  

 I think about a nursery and I picture curly heads  

And one by one I count them as they slumber in their beds  

If you're worried and you can't sleep

 Just count your blessings instead of sheep 

 And you'll fall asleep counting your blessings

Horseback riding in Titiwangsa

Sometimes on a weekend, my husband and I would bring little Anne to Titiwangsa Lake Gardens for her to enjoy her horseback riding... Here are some pics....

Cruelty and evil

Cruelty is often the result of fear of some kind. A cruel leader fears lack of control or respect, for example. A soldier may be cruel because he fears the consequences if people think he's weak or disobedient.

In my own life I've found that people are SOMETIMES cruel because they fear others. In these instances, I try to forgive the man or woman even if I can't forgive the deed.

If someone is cruel to you it can become like pass the parcel. We can experience a cruel or evil deed, and either move on or take on some of those characteristics ourselves. The lessons of history have shown us that some individuals and groups are more cruel or evil than others.

"I can't understand how someone can do something really evil and yet God would forgive them. I could forgive small things but not some of the horrible cruel and evil things people do." "If there was no evil in the world it wouldn't be much fun. Wouldn't it be boring if we didn't ever do anything wrong." "If God is so great, loving and all powerful why doesn't he put a stop to evil in the world? Why does he allow people to behave this way?" "People should take personal responsibility for their own actions. I can't make someone else choose to be good instead of bad, it's a choice left to them. You choose to be good or bad yourself." "If I am told I must do something that I really don't agree with, I have a dilemma. If I do it regardless of how I feel, I manage to avoid potential bad consequences, but am not being true to myself. If I refuse I can be at risk in some way." "Societies judge for themselves what is and isn't evil. It's up to those in a role of leadership to set the common view of what is and is not evil and what is and is not acceptable evil in society." "Who says what is good and bad? If I steal because I am starving, is that evil or not?" "When we are afraid we may do things that are not true to our character." "If I was made to kill someone else then I can't be held to blame, can I?"

Interfering mother-in-laws cause sadness

Researchers in the UK conducted a study on the relationship between a mother in-law and daughter in-law and found it is the root causes of many family conflicts. Friction between the two can resulting in long term unhappiness and stress to their daughters in-law who accuse the elder women of showing unreasonable jealousy and maternal love towards their sons.

The Daily Telegraph quoted lead researcher Terri Apter as saying,

“Mother In-law and daughter in-law conflict emerges from an expectation that each is criticising or undermining the other. But this mutual unease may have less to do with actual attitudes and far more to do with persistent female norms that few of us manage to take off completely.’

Mr. Terri added:

“As they struggle to achieve the same position in the family as primary woman, each tries to establish or protect their status; each feels threatened by the other.”

Interviewing, hundreds of families, for her new book, ‘What Do You Want From Me?” he found that over two-thirds of women said their husband’s mother caused them anxiety while the mother in-law complained they were isolated by their daughters in-law.

More often the researchers found disputes starting over simple matters like who is more aware about issues such as cooking and the welfare of the child.

____________________________________________________________

Having mother-in-law problems is nothing to laugh at. When television portrays an overbearing, over-indulgent, or overpowering spouse’s mother, we laugh while empathizing with their frustration. In reality, a single visit or phone call from our mother-in-law frequently injects us with a serious dosage of tension and aggravation that lasts for weeks, months . . . or longer.

• “I was just trying to help.”
• “In my day we never . . .”
• “Are you sure that you can afford to . . .?”
• “I don’t know what I’ve done to make you dislike/hate me!”
• “I only say/do these things out of love and deep concern.”
• “I never meant to upset you!”

The solution to one’s mother-in-law problems seems obvious, although not the sensible solution. You could live as far away from her as possible, restrict her visits and exposure to your children, and make sure your spouse knows his/her mother is the sole culprit in the bothersome relationship. In other words, you could establish that you’re usually right and your mother-in-law is frequently wrong! Surely these are not the most sensible solutions!

Having realistic expectations is vital when addressing mother-in-law problems. We all want to keep our sanity, while not allowing a tense situation to escalate. Is there a sensible solution for all concerned?

Three Steps to Sanity:

• Become One - Marriage unites two unique individuals into a single body, mind, and spirit. Tension arises when either spouse includes a relative or non-professional into their personal decision-making process (finances, family planning). Even the best intentions do not justify a mother-in-law’s involvement in the marriage union. The husband-wife relationship is one of honor and respect for one’s spouse -- intimate and separate from outside influence.
  
  
• Set Priorities - Loyalty and devotion to your spouse’s well-being is crucial. Loyalty, however, doesn’t justify taking sides against the mother-in-law. Are you fueling animosity towards your spouse’s mother ? Does your spouse have to defend your fiery attacks on his/her mother? If your mother-in-law is a constant irritant, address the issue constructively). In choosing to protect your marriage, you will give priority to cultivating harmony instead of hostility towards your spouse and both mothers-in-law. Through your “oneness,” a couple can establish the priorities and attitudes that foster a loving atmosphere in your home.
  
  
• Exchange Respect - Your mother-in-law is the mother of your beloved. Her personality, physical characteristics, and care-giving shaped your beloved life-mate. As a mother-in-law, I must realize that I contribute to that relationship (good, bad, or ugly) with that unique individual, our child’s chosen partner for life. Even with diverse backgrounds and traditions, it is possible to exchange mutual respect
  

Jealousy and bringing others down...

Datuk Sosilawati Murder case...

Forensics at the scene...


one of the divers finding a murder weapon...

Datuk Solilawati's car found..


Al Fatihah to Datuk Sosilawati, Noorhisham, Ahmad Kamil and Kamaruddin. May their souls rest in peace. And may their murderers burn in hell for what they've done.(sorry if I seem blood thirsty but imagine being bludgeoned to death and then burnt just because the killers are greedy SOBs...

Sosilawati And Three Others Brutally Murdered And Burnt

BANTING, Sept 12 (Bernama) -- In one of the most gruesome murder cases that stunned the nation, cosmetics millionaire Datuk Sosilawati Lawiya and three others were killed, their bodies burnt and ashes strewn into a river in Tanjong Sepat near here, ending the two-weeks mysterious disappearance of the four. Adding to the drama in the midst of the Hari Raya Aidilfitri celebrations, a prominent 41-year-old lawyer in Banting, carrying the title "Datuk" was arrested along with his 38-year-old brother, two women and four others, including farm workers. Bukit Aman CID director Datuk Seri Mohd Bakri Zinin said that the suspects admitted they took the victims to the four-hectare plantation, bludgeoned them to death and burned their bodies. They later scattered the ashes at a river near Ladang Gadong, Tanjong Sepat, Mohd Bakri told a news conference at the Kuala Langat district police headquarters here Sunday. Mohd Bakri said however that police would still need the forensic confirmation to fully determine their identities. He said the families of the victims had been informed and that police would still need further confirmation from the forensic division and Chemistry Department. "What I can confirm now is that after the admission of the suspects, the chances of them (missing four) still alive is extremely remote," he said. Police had dispatched forensic and chemistry teams to comb the area, along with pathologist and police dog units. A forensic personnel said they smelt petrol at the area where the four were believed to have been murdered and burned. Besides the Nouvelle Visages (NV) cosmetics line founder, Sosilawati, 47, also killed were her driver Kamaruddin Shamsudin, 44, CIMB Kampung Baru branch bank officer Noorhisham Mohammad, 38, and her personal lawyer Ahmad Kamil Abdul Karim, 32. The ex-wife of rock singer Nash, and the trio were reported missing since Aug 30 after going to Banting, apparently for a land purchase deal. A week later, police found Sosilawati's BMW X5 at the Angsana Apartment in USJ 1, Subang Jaya and a BMW 5 series belonging to Ahmad Kamil, at a housing estate in front of a hotel in Subang Jaya. Mohd Bakri said police were investigating the case under Section 302 of the Penal Code, which carries the mandatory death sentence if convicted, and that Kuala Lumpur police would handle the investigation because the victims were last seen leaving Sosilawati's office in Kuala Lumpur. On the motive of the incident, Mohd Bakri said it pointed towards business rivalry between the two lawyers and Sosilawati. The lawyers, believed to have been suspended from practice for one year in 2007, were known among locals as land brokers and believed to be handling some land matters worth millions for Sosilawati. Police are believed to have obtained a seven-day remand order to facilitate investigations into the case on all the suspects, aged between 19 and 41, who were now being detained at the Bukit Jalil police station in Kuala Lumpur. While the mystery surrounding Sosilawati's disappearance more of less unravelled today, it opened up another mystery of what was happening at the farm which is surrounded by concrete wall and oil palm trees, as well as goat and cattle barns. Mohd Bakri said in fact, the suspects had confessed that they had used a similar modus operandi before and police were now investigating the disappearance of four people in the area since last year. According to local residents, the lawyer is a well-known local figure and had assisted foreign workers who were cheated of their salaries by their employers. "He is also known as a land broker. But we are certainly shocked with his arrest," said a resident. A man who has plot of land near the farm of the accused said the latter's farm was surrounded by walls and had an automatic door and strictly out of bounds. -- BERNAMA